It Figures...

Erin is set to leave for TX in a week. She's going to be down there for about three weeks, so it would be nice for her to be able to take her laptop.... but NOOOOOO! It took a crap yesterday. I'm sure it'll cost a bunch of money that we dont have to fix. Why does crap like this always happen?

I'll be leaving shortly to get an estimate. Apparently HP laptops have this problem often. There have been no problems with it in almost two years. What a crock!

Wish me luck.

5 weeks down...1 to go!

Ok, so it's been awhile since we've updated this. Kelly's been in AL (Maxwell AFB) for 5 weeks already and we get to see him on Friday (June 26). I can't wait! It's been too long! Ian misses his daddy too!
We've been keeping busy with play dates, a new spray park, T-ball on Thursday evenings, riding his new bike, the pool in our back yard and movies. I try to keep him as busy as possible to keep him out of trouble and for the most part....it's working. We went to a birthday party for a friend of mine's son, Nate, who turned 1 last week. It was at the park and some of Ian's other little friends came so he had a great time. He did get stung by a bee for the first time though. He cried and said that "the BIG (he spread his arms out to the sides of him) bee stinged him" His arm swelled up some, but nothing serious. I gave him some benadryl when we got home and it was almost gone the next morning. I 'still' hear about the 'BIG bee that stinged me'! Funny kid!
Quick update on the IVF stuff. I've got all my tests done, all the blood work done and I'm sending the big check tomorrow to pay for it all. Kelly still has one more test and a blood draw when he gets back and then he's done. I'm supposed to call down to Wilford Hall (remember that's where the baby/babies will be concieved) on day one of my mentrual cycle and that's when they'll tell me when to start taking birth control and when I'll stop taking it. I'll hopefully find out then when they want me there or maybe they'll call me sooner. Apparently we're put in groups to make it easier on the doctors?? I don't know...I'm doing what Kelly has always wanted me to do..."Go with the flow"! It's hard, but really I have no control of anything now that all the prep work is done. I just sit and wait! I'll be sure to let you all know when I/we have to be down there. I say I because Kelly will more than likely be here with Ian most of the time I'm down there. He does have to come down to make his deposit (I know he'll love me saying that) and that's it according to Dr. King (yep, that was the infertility doctor that we met with). If anyone wants to come hang with me after they do the embrio transfer you are more than welcome. I'll need to relax and take it easy, but I don't want to be bored.
Well, that's all I know for now, but more to come....
Oh, we get to see Emily and her family on Saturday and Sunday in AL. They're driving up and staying the night. We'll finally get to meet baby Tyler now that he's 3 1/2 months old already. Kelly graduates the academy on Tuesday June 30th and then we'll be home the next day. Ian will be going to stay with his 'other' dad on July 4th for 2 weeks. I'll miss him, but he needs to see his 'other' family too. I'm going up to WI on July 9th for 5 or 6 days. I'll get to see my parents new 'cottage'. I'm really looking forward to the break too. Kelly's staying here because he can't take anymore time off of work right now.
I guess that's it now...for real.... ;-)
Oh, the guy who's sitting next to Ian is Nate's grandpa and Ian calls him Grandpa too.

First Day Turkey Hunting

I was skunked today. After getting pulled over by a state trooper for "not stopping at a stop sign", I got out to the farm late. By the time I located some gobblers and got the decoys set up, the turkeys were out of the trees. After about three hours sitting over that field I moved.

Long story short I saw 5 hens by about 10 am, but no toms. Then I left to get a drink. After I got back I settled in and scratched a few yelps. I heard a faint answer. So we called back and forth to each other for a good hour or so. Eventually he shut up and I didn't see him... until I saw movement going up the hill. He was chasing the last two hens that came within 10 feet of me earlier.

I'm not upset in the least. I got to see three deer in the field, six turkeys and a black squirrel. Even though I didnt shoot I had a great day. It's 9 pm and I'm TIRED. The fresh air and being outdoors was well worth it.

Tomorrow I'll be up nice and early and set up well before the sun even thinks about rising. The decoys will be all set up when the birds fly down. Hopefully I have a turkey on the ground by 6:30 or so. If not, I'll still be glad to get outside.

Global Warming

I sure wish this global warming would stop! We cant go outside today and play with Ian because of this horrible "climate change". They (the ever knowledgeable weather people) are saying it could be MUCH worse tonight.

It's so warm in our part of the globe that cold white orbs fell from the sky and rested on the ground for a short while. I've also noticed that it's so warm that my legs turn white and eventually blue when I wear shorts outside.

Please contact Al Gore and let him know that we need him to step up his efforts to extort money out of people for carbon credits. I could really use some of the money from those people... I'd burn it for heat.

We're Back in IL!

After 2100 miles and many, MANY hours of driving, we're home. Ian was such a good boy in the car. No accidents, not much whining, and just enough talking. He fell asleep about an hour before we got home, so it was a chore getting him to bed because he was confused. He ran into his room without his pajamas and smiled as he snuggled into his bed. I'm taking that as a sign that he's glad to be home. He gave kisses and had me say his prayers for him. I'm pretty sure he was asleep before I shut the light off.

Erin has already started laundry. My clothes are put away and hers will be tomorrow. The dogs will be home tomorrow and Ian goes back to pre-school, so things will be back to normal... as normal as things get.

We got to see friends and Ian got to spend time with Brooke and her family. She said that Ian was very well behaved, but as soon as we got around, he'd act up. He's not a bad kid anyway, so she just had it easy. It was good to see her, Brian and the kids though.

One thing to note. When you enter TX, there are signs that say "Drive Friendly... The Texas Way". This is a falsehood. No one IN Texas, and anyone FROM Texas drives "friendly". Unless "friendly" is driving too slow in the fast lane. Or not moving over to allow someone to merge onto the interstate. Or speeding up so that one cannot pass them. Or tailgating and trying to "push" you out of their way even though a car fifteen places ahead is slowing things down.

Everything's bigger in TX... Even the road rage.

Great News

We had a very productive appointment here in San Antonio today. I got to see what an annual gynecologist checkup was. That was... intere... strange. Then Erin had an ultrasound of her junk from the inside. That one will be fodder for the occasional joke for years to come.

Continuing on, the Dr. said that if all goes well we can get into the August "batch" for IVF. Erin will have to be here for up to three weeks, but I only have to be here for a day or two. We're going to have to save the money for the procedure by then because my insurance doesn't cover the procedure. I foresee a lot of mac and cheese and beans and rice in our near future. I'll probably be peddling my butt to work as well to save gas.

Speaking of "batches", I get to deliver one to the lab in the morning. I'm THRILLED! It's worth it though. There are typically three things that you can deliver to the lab. I'd rather it be one of the other two.

Erin's back.

Yay.

That is all.

It's Ash Wednesday....that start of Lent!

This year I've decided to fast during Lent. Kelly has been doing it for awhile and thought I should do it too. I'm fasting french fries and sweets this year. Kelly said he'll fast light beer...lol (I wouldn't put it past him either) He'll probably do french fries again, but who knows.
We're also giving up meat on Fridays. I guess we'll be going to lots of fish fry's again. This place is infested with them.

My Back-e-otomy

Like many people I have lower back pain. It comes from years of wearing issued boots and doing the physical labor that cannot be done by a machine. Loading cargo on airplanes is pretty demanding. You have to climb up on the plane, push pallets that can weigh up to 10,000 lbs, and contort your body to fit underneath vehicles and other cargo that needs to be chained down. Another part of my job is passenger service. We have to load the passengers onto aircraft and do the paperwork that comes with it. Baggage also comes with passengers. People like their stuff. Most bags are heavy, and when you're in the belly of a commercial plane throwing bags while bent over it can take a toll on your body.

I mentioned all of that because as a young Airman, you're expected to do more of the physical work. I now know that it's because once you've been doing this for a while, you cannot do as much of the grunt work. Now that I'm older I don't want to be the guy that makes the young'ns do the hard work exclusively. So, after years of back problems I started getting more proactive.

At Hurlburt Field I started traction. If you don't know what it is, I'll explain. It's where you're hooked up to a machine that stretches you. Your upper body is anchored to a table and your lower body is connected via a harness to a machine that pulls your spine in varying degrees of weight and time. My pulls were usually around 125 lbs and there was a 45 second pull with a 15 second let off to about 25% of the weight. It worked wonders at first, but eventually it was just a way to relieve discomfort.

I got to Sheppard and discontinued because I was in an office environment. It got better, but after four years of marching and running with Airmen, the pain started to come back. I went to get an x-ray and MRI done and got a call stating that I had degenerative disc disease and that the discs around two vertebrae were compressed and bulging. It caused pressure on my right sciatic nerve. They did a nerve test with electricity and determined that the signal is degraded. I had an epidural to inject steroids and pain meds into my spine but I hated it. I felt like I had to take a dump for about 4 weeks. Knowing that I had reached my last resort and that I don't want another needle in my back unless absolutely necessary I made an appointment once we moved to IL.

I told the new Doc that I didn't want pills and that I'd try anything short of surgery and the needle. He suggested chiropractic treatment and possibly acupuncture. Honestly when I think of acupuncture, I have visions of a witch doctor with a bone through his nose and chicken blood on his face dancing around me sticking flaming needles in my body. Chiropractors on the other hand actually wear clothes so I went that route.

I made the appointment and had the pre-interview. They said I was a great candidate for the treatment and I sat in the waiting room. I went in with the Doctor and he asked about my pain and had me sit on the table. He tested my reflexes and muscle resistance. He contorted me to see where I had problems with mobility. My neck was stiff as well as my upper back. This was from trying to keep my lower back from moving too much. He felt my lower back and touched a lump right above my butt. He asked if that was a problem and I told him it was the main problem. His tone got excited and he said "I'm going to help you today!". I was skeptical. For about nine years I've had that lump and no other doctor seemed to give a damn. I thought it was a deformity or something. It turns out that it was a muscle that got pinched in my sacroiliac joint (SI). This is the joint between your pelvis, tailbone and spine. I laid on my back and he said that I looked crooked. He put me on my left side and popped my left SI joint. Then he popped my right one, the one with the lump. I immediately felt relief. He put me on my back and adjusted my cervical vertebrae and almost all of my spine. I even felt my sternum pop. He stood the bed up and told me to bend at the waist. I felt 100% better. Then I reached back to feel the lump.

It was gone!

After nine years, the lump was gone. The lump that was a misplaced muscle, that was as hard as bone had disappeared. I looked at the Doc and he was grinning from ear to ear. I really was impressed. It's great to have someone treat you that truly loves what they do. I then went to have ultrasonic muscle stimulation. At first I couldn't feel anything. Then slowly I started to feel the "zapping" sensation. Apparently it contracts and relaxes your muscles faster than your body can on it's own. I wasn't feeling anything at first because the nerve and muscle hadn't been working for years. The joint was completely locked up.

Now I'm officially a believer. This stuff works. I can turn my head all the way to each side and I don't have the small "hitch" in my step. My posture is better and I have new pain in other parts of my back because I'm not used to using it all. It's great though. It's way better than a needle in the back or surgery. I've been told that because of my age I'll probably need the surgery, but as long as I can get chiropractic treatment I'll put it off as long as possible. I can see how this can be addicting. Although today's treatment was more intense than last weeks and I am slightly sore, I can tell it worked. The Doc had the same proud smile. That's something that's missing with people today.

This Doctor really does this to help people. We talked about his practice and stuff and he said he made more money in private practice than on base but he does it for fun and really enjoys his work.

He's one of the few people in this world that "gets it". For that, I'm thankful.

Another Thought

We've lost the last true bit of entertainment for a while. Governor Blagojevich was removed from office today and also was prohibited from EVER holding public office in IL again. If you havent seen them, google his recent interviews on Glenn Beck, The View, Rachel Maddow and with Geraldo. I chuckled at each one. This guy is a nut case. He thinks that he's not guilty because he was "just talking". So I guess it's not illegal if I just started "talking" about carrying a b0mb (yes, that's a zero) on a plane?

Who would have thought that we'd have an impromptu reality show in the IL state government?

*side note- when spell check caught Blagojevich's name, the only alternative spelling was archipelago. I guess that could be worse than being a guy named Kelly.

Seriously?

So I had to leave work early on Tuesday. Is the suspense killing you? Why on earth would this nearly perfect human specimen have to leave work? Pinkeye. Yep. I'm days away from my 32nd birthday and I get friggin' pinkeye. Seriously?

Ok, leaving work wasnt that big of a deal. Again, why... on a Tuesday on the AMC, USTRANSCOM, and Army SDDC Headquarters base? We should be swamped what with the 60 or so Generals and hundreds of Colonels running around. Yep, not so much. It seems that 2 to 2.5" of snow can cripple the Air Force. Seriously? Only mission essential personnel (ME) were to report to work. It was mission essential for me to tell retirees that they couldnt fly for free that day (with goop in my eye), while most people were snug in bed, safe and warm. It's not like the storm didnt give advance notice. This is Illinois. The midwest is known for snow and ice, not to mention cold winters. The base has been here since the days when Airships were cutting edge. The base closed... seriously.

So, I called the hospital to tell them that I needed to be seen at sick call. I got a recording. It seems that medical personnel are not mission essential. I dialed the nurse line and they told me to go to the EMERGENCY ROOM. For PINKEYE! Seriously? I asked just to make sure, "the emergency room, for pinkeye?" She said do not go to urgent care. I called the emergency room and they said to come on down... for pinkeye. C'mon!

So, after my eyeball was pressure washed with what had to be iodine and citric acid, and following the light around the room, I sat back up. Dont worry about the yellow stain running down the side of my face, it'll wash off... someday. She said Yep, it's conjunctivitis. That's Pinkeye for us lay people. I needed all of that just to be sure. The fact that my normally white eyeball was RED and covered in mucus. The iodine, the acid, the 10 days of antibiotics and drops four times daily... all for pinkeye. Seriously?

I'm glad to say that I'm back to normal though. Well except for the "side effects" of the antibiotics. I'm sure most of you know what that means. Supposedly yogurt helps. Not for me.

So, I'm off to bed. We're going to pick up my mom tomorrow evening and then we're headed up to Joliet to see family and celebrate Ian's birthday. If you get the chance to ask him, he's "free" and his "birfday" is "janrary six". He's so excited to go to Chuck E. Cheese he cant contain himself. We're excited too.

Winter Wonderland!

We are in a Winter Wonderland here in southern IL. I didn't think we would get a real snow fall this year, but we finally did starting Monday night! I think in all we got 6 inches or so. Ian loves the snow. He especially loves to "help" shovel. We took him sledding this afternoon and he wasn't too sure of it. He only ended up going down 3 times, twice with me and once with Kelly. I haven't been sledding in YEARS and I don't remember it hurting so bad when you go over the jump at the end (thanks to the neighborhood kids). I can't believe I actually loved going off the jumps. Here are some pictures from yesterday and today. I might make 'snow cream' tomorrow, but that depends on how many dogs decide to color my snow.

Color Blind

I realized yesterday when I got home that I'm more color blind than most. All day at work I heard on the news that this is a "historic" inauguration, blah, blah, blah. I finally asked a few people what the big deal is and they looked at me like I wasnt wearing pants. One of them finally said "he's black".

I said "oh" and turned around. I realized that it's never been an issue to me. When I got home I told Erin about it and she said that it wasnt a big deal to her.

Today there was a comment made on msn.com from a woman in MD that more has been said about what color he is but not what kind of leader he'll be. Hopefully it's out of everyone's system because President Obama has a long, arduous task at hand. Israel vs. Gaza, N. Korea is acting stupid again, Russia has made comments that they'll bow up on us. Ok, I know that "Russia" and "N. Korea" havent said things, but you know what I mean. The whack jobs in charge of them have shown that they'll try us.

Hopefully Obama reniegs on half of his promises. His past rhetoric has bordered socialist. With Hillary on his team and Feinstein foaming at the mouth we need to be prepared for a fight. Communism has failed in every instance except Cuba, and who cares about them? Communism wants the people to be dependent on the state to provide but ultimately the people have nothing. What's the first thing they need to take? Guns. If we are armed, we can rise up. It's hard to fight the army with pitch forks and such.

I really do hope for change. I'm not bitter that a republican didnt win because honestly I'm fairly even keeled. I dont care about gays in the military or gay marriage. I figure if gay people want to be married, let them. Right now they have it easy. They can start and end relationships arbitrarily, but with marriage comes work. If you want to end a marriage, it's a pain in the rectum. No pun intended. Ha. Anyway, I dont care about that. It's not my fight. I do care about being a good person. You can be a good person and be gay. Ok, so I guess my point is that I dont care about that, but a lot of people do. Obama went on the record stating that he supported gay marriage. Now that he's been elected he has changed his tune. He said that Marriage is a union between a "man and a woman". I bet that chaps some people's asses. (strange that when gay comes up, chaps and asses are mentioned).

Ok, this was supposed to be a short thing about how I dont care that Obama's black. I'm actually glad. It's about time. It could have been worse... Hillary. We dont know what the hell she is!

The biggest loser is on. We're going to watch it and talk about how we need to lose weight.

5:30 AM at Philadelphia International Airport

I got here at 4:40 after turning the rental car in. I checked my bags outside because the line inside was ridiculous. I'll let it be known to those that dont know me that I dont like flying. One of my favorite things is watching people in the Airport. It's hilarious. Especially this early in the morning.

Here are the notable performers from this morning's visit.

To my 10 O'clock there is a man with a mowhawk. He's wearing a lambskin coat with the wool lining, ripped jeans and crocs. He's about 50, so the mowhawk is just a tad pathetic. His traveling "partner" is also wearing crocs, the same color. If you didnt catch it by now, they are gay. Not that there's anything wrong with that. It's just strange what kind of people are attracted to each other. The non-mowhawk guy has the requisite mustache.

Directly across from me, about 2 feet away is an old man. He looks like Ernest Hemmingway. He smells like him too. He keeps discreatly raising his leg and about 30 seconds after each leg raise, he fidgets. Guess what follows? Yep, the smell of prune juice and grape nuts. It's strange. He just got up. Oh my God! My eyes are watering. That wasnt obvious. He's back. He must not like the smell of himself. His crocs are grey. I'm not kidding. Three grown men within 15 feet of me are wearing plastic/rubber shoes.

Behind me is an obnoxious family from New York. I know that they are from NY because every 45 seconds or so I hear something mentioned about how much better it is there. The dad is loud and the mom is constantly asking him for a straw. The kids are in their pajamas, the boy in Sponge Bob and the girl in pink. The pajamas are too small. The dad is a bit slow. He hasnt picked up on my subtle hints that he should stop moving the chair. In case you cant hear him, he'd like everyone in the tri-state area to know that he doesnt feel well and that he's moving slow this morning. The mom wants him to take charge of the kids while she walks around. She was going to get an egg and cheese panini but didnt want to wait in line. Again, he doesnt feel well. He asked what a panini is, and says that he hasnt heard of one in NY. They are seriously the loudest people in gate A9.

Mowhawk guy is sleeping on mustache man's shoulder.

To my nine O'clock there is a man with his thumb up his nose.

Spongebob's name is Kyle. I've heard that name enough this morning to know that I dont like it anymore.

They are calling for passengers now.

Bye.

Last Day in NJ

So, I'm done with the class. Please hold your applause until you finish reading this. I got a 93.7 on the final test. The pre-course assessment (test) was horrible. I got a 33. So, this just shows how awesome I am. I would dazzle you by explaining the theory of relativity, but I dont want to lose you.

Ok, if you've never been to NJ here are a few things that I've observed. You cant pump your own gas. It's illegal. You wouldn't think this is such a bad thing until you have to wait in line for the ONE guy that works there to pump the eleventy-three cars in front of you. Dont bother going to the station down the road, they only have one pump jockey too.

Next is the "jughandle". Most of you think this is how you get the milk from the case into your cart. You sir, or ma'am, would be WRONG. You see, in NJ you have to turn right to turn left. Think about it... let it sink in... Now this wouldnt be a bad thing if they were CONSISTENT in the placement and type of jug handle used. It would also be nice if they would use ONLY a jug handle for left turns. It really sucks when you plan to turn left, get in the right lane and then pass the left turn lane on the LEFT side of the road. I've probably wasted 5 gallons of gas in the last two weeks backtracking because of poor signage or inconsistency. Jughandles, they hate me and I hate them. U turns are illegal too. Everyone does it though, because jughandles suck!
Here are two references of them.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jughandle
http://www.tfhrc.gov/safety/pubs/07032/images/figure7.gif

NJ has pizza joints EVERYWHERE. Not Dominos, Pizza Hut or Papa John's. I'm talking about honest to goodness mom and pop places. I've eaten in three pizza places near Ft. Dix and McGuire AFB and three places here in Bordentown. In each place there are at least two people in the back yelling at each other in Italian. I havent had a bad slice yet. They are huge slices and almost always have completely fresh ingredients.

I think that's all I have for now. I have to go look for another bag because my checked bag was a couple of pounds too heavy. I need to get to bed early tonight because I have to get up at the ass crack of dawn. My flight is at 6:30, you have to be there at least 1.5 hrs prior so that's 5:00 and it's about an hour to Philly. I have to turn my rental in too. Yay for me! I have to leave here at 3:30!

{APPLAUSE}

My baby is BACK!

We are one again! I was seriously in a temporary depression and didn't realize it until yesterday. I left yesterday morning around 6am to drive down to Miami, OK to pick up Ian. I actually left a little earlier than Eliaser so that I could gamble a little bit at The Stables Casino. This casino is by far the smallest and smokiest casino that I have been in. So at 1230pm at a pre-chosen McDonald's in Miami I got to see my baby again after 15 days! When Eliaser pulled up behind me I could see Ian get really excited. Ian's great grandma, Victoria aka Grandma Honey, told me that Ian saw my car and said, " MOMMY'S CAR!" I guess he missed me as much as I missed him! Being away from your child for that long makes you realize how much you REALLY do love them, even when they are in certain stages of their lives, whether it be the terrible two's or HORRIBLE three's. (We are currently in the HORRIBLE three's stage at the this time. There is no end in site...yet)

So we do the exchange and we leave. Ian and I drove straight home...no stopping for 5 hours. I just wanted to get home and he slept close to 3 hours of the trip. We got home around 6pm last night. Ian was so excited to see all of his toys again. I took him upstairs to show him his painted bedroom and he was even happier about that! (I have pictures of the rooms that I'll post in the next day or two)

Ahhhh... Monday

So school is finally over for the day. Today we spent all day covering Budgeting. We learned about the different stages and appropriation of funds. We learned where we fall in the whole process and about the different "pots" of money that we get funded through. Due to my high level of awesomeness I knew pieces of this already so this basically connected the dots.

I'm about to do the review questions for today and do another practice spend plan or two. I just wanted to share some observations from today.

First, Lt Bojangles is staying in my hotel. I saw him this morning and saluted him as I walked to my rental. I must say that I looked stunning in my blues while he looked like crap. His jaw dropped when he finally realized who I was.

Next, when the Army isn't getting into bar fights, grunting HooAHH, or kicking in doors, they are standing around. I think that 90% of the Army augments the BX/Clothing Sales & Burger King. I'm not kidding... much. Seriously though. Every time I go into one of these places there are 500 soldiers blocking the entrance, smoking with their hands in their pockets. All the while they are engaging in a loudness contest and searching to see who can string the most swear words together into an intelligible sentence. They give hope to stoners everywhere. I have a foul mouth but these freaks put me to shame.

When I drive to and from school there are typically 50 soldiers standing by every bus stop. Most bus stops are close enough together that you can see the next. I had to follow a base shuttle bus today and watched someone get on the bus at the BX and he got off a half mile later. It's ridiculous. Maybe I'm being too harsh, he probably had a cramp... or his foot was still asleep from standing for too long in the same spot.

There has to be something better for them to do. At least in the AF we know better than to congregate in large groups. We know that if the wrong person sees it that very soon someone will be cleaning grass out the the cracks in the pavement or making something look pretty. If you've got time to lean, you've got time to clean.

That about sums up what's on my mind right now. I keep biting the inside of my bottom lip, it's pissing me off. Just when it seems to be healed I do it again and get the salty taste of blood. I'm going to get my homework done and at least stretch and do some push ups and sit ups to counteract the ever growing ball of flesh where my abs used to be.

OK bye.

My First Week In NJ

I'm up at Ft. Dix, NJ (yes, that's really the name). I've been here since last Sunday for the Management of Aerial Port Operations Course. It's a really good class and I've learned a lot more about why things are done the way they are in not only my career field but in the Air Force and DoD Transportation System. Now I have answers to questions that I asked as an Airman. It's sad that no one would (or maybe they couldn't) explain it to me. Anyway, I've been spending a lot of time studying. I've been out of my career field for a while, so this is helping me to gain more knowledge and acclimate faster. I'm not on track for distinguished graduate, but that's OK because even people senior to me scored less than I did.

OK, so at the conclusion of my first week things weren't going so well. I don't want to go to NYC, I've been there and it didn't impress me much. I could go to Philly, but I feel guilty seeing new things without Erin and Ian. So, I resigned myself to hanging around Bordentown, NJ and studying for my next stripe.

Last night (Friday) I planned on getting some good food, having a few beers and studying. I got a really good veal parmesan with penne pasta and a disgusting soup with chicken and cabbage. This veal parm is the real deal! OK, so I ate, had a beer and put the CD in the laptop. Then I hear a muffled boom, boom, boom. GREAT! Techno music! It sounded like spaceships were invading. I looked out my window and expected to see green men in silver suits with laser guns. Instead I see greasy hair and tight pants. Yes. Guidos. They were here for a party in the banquet room.

So, I try to study, but I cant concentrate over the techno music and the sound of 200 people chomping their gum. I swear I heard Fran Drescher's laugh more than once. I almost went to get an autograph... and punch her in the ear. I gave up on studying and watched some TV. I eventually drifted... OK, I didn't drift off to sleep, I passed out from exhaustion at 2 am when the "music" stopped and everyone spit their gum out. I can still hear the laugh in my head though. It's burned into my brain like a brand in the ass of the veal that I ate.

So, Erin calls and wakes me up this morning. She wasn't expecting me to be sleeping but I dont have any plans and I had to try to erase the laugh from my head. I finally showered and got dressed around 11 and came over to Dunkin' Donuts around noon. I love this place. Chocolate glazed donuts are the best thing since... veal. Maybe they should feed chocolate glazed donuts to the veal calves?

Here I sit, with a few Arab guys that seem to own the place. This area has a lot of Arabs. I'm not trying to be insensitive. I don't know where they come from so I'm generalizing. There was a large family here when I got here. They're the typical loud Jersey family. They were doing NOTHING to break down the stereotype. Anyway, one of them is a 1st LT in the Army. He looks to be a few years younger than I am. He's talking about his upcoming deployment and I glean from their not so quiet shouting match that others are coming from out of town to meet him. I assume he's leaving soon. He's in his ACU's and is feeding his adoring family snippets of info that aren't particularly important. Remember, there are Arabs sitting 12-15 feet behind him. If I can hear it, so can they.

So he's talking about the training that their medics get and how they train on pigs. It's a necessary evil. Nothing too shocking. BUT, he decides to look important and says "don't repeat this, it's kinda classified". No it's not. It's no secret. He just wanted to do some chest beating. He kept saying things like "with my rank, I can..." and "my soldiers know that they cant..."

So I'm sitting here trying to mind my business and enjoy my small piece of chocolate glazed heaven. He started another story with "don't repeat this either, it's classified." I cleared my throat loudly. By loudly, it sounded like a grizzly bear was choking on a rabbit. They all looked at me and I gave a stern look and shook my head. The conversation got quiet and I heard "who the hell is he?" I took out my ID card and held it up. Lt Moron just kept quiet and looked defeated.

We all get briefed about Communications/Operations Security. We're not allowed to talk about things with people that don't need to know. Hell, Erin still doesn't know some of the places I've been or things that I've done. I don't really like it, but it's the way it is. She's accepted it and understands. There are some things we cant talk about and then there are things that we just don't want to talk about.

In hindsight, I realize that this guy HAS to be the stupidest officer in the Army. It's well known that Lt's don't know anything. But I have a pretty short haircut and they saw me pull up in my rental "car". There are TONS of military people staying here because lodging on base is full. They all left, and me and Lt Assclown had a little stare down. He lost.

So now I'm almost finished with my extra large coffee, and I'm sucking the remnants of the donuts from my teeth. I'm going to drive down to a local outdoors store because I saw a big banner advertising a sale.

I may go have lunch at Red Robin. My good friend the Lt mentioned that they are all going there for lunch.